Mandi (amanda_21a) wrote in ana_rexic,
Mandi
amanda_21a
ana_rexic

New..

Hey, im new to this communtiy, and to all ana/mia communities, although i have been ana for few years now.. On and off . Whenever i reach my goal weight, i tell myeslf that i can reward myself with a treat- and that turns into a binge that turns into binging for a week,which turns into a lost goal.

I dont want to get into to much detail on my first post, But i wanted to say hi to everyone and im here to offer support as someone who has experienced every aspect of Ed's

Im not 100% sure on the abbreviations, But ill try my best :P

Height: 5'6.5
CW: 114lbs
GW: 95
*Need to loose almost 20lbs   :|
-Working on: SELF CONTROLL


*Does anyone ever wake up, and think.. OK IM NOT GOING TO EAT TODAY, and when u get up in the morning you are so skinny, you look perfect and for a few minutes you are actually happy thinking maybe your on the right track. Then you go to the kitchen, and the family has breakfast for you.. You think, One bite will be Ok.. After eating a whole plate you have a huge gut and want to die. You throw on the baggiest clothes you can find and start your day. Eating nothing because you manage to keep yourself busy (although youv been thinking about the foot sitting at home, or the grocery store down the street all day)  When you get home, you are proud of yourself for not eating alll day, with the exceptipon of the Huge breakfast you try to forget. Then your all alone, nothing to do but think of food.. And you do it again-

That has been me for about 5 years now... Its taking over my life..

-I know it is pretty long and detailed, especially for a first post.. But i really had to get that out, i have never had support before, or people to turn to about my problems
thanks
 

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